Philly re-opens I-95 with all city team mascots on a fire truck, because Go Birds

As basically the only one of my relatives that ever moved outside the Delaware Valley, you have to understand that Philadelphia is the most parochial city in America. If you are born in Pennsylvania, you are more likely to die in Pennsylvania than if you’re born in any other state. And that gets turned up even more the closer you get to the Southeastern corner.

That type of generational imprinting comes with certain side effects; an unusual accent that changes based on which neighborhood you’re from, being the only place where people wake up and ask “what’s for dinner” as that’s how treasured the meal is, and a love of the local professional sports teams that is as unhealthy as the city’s signature food.

Hawai’i has “Aloha,” Philly has “Go Birds.” It can be used to say “thanks for taking my order Ms. Wawa cashier, have a great day” or “that guy is wearing a Cowboys jersey and I’m about to beat him senseless for this crime.” And if you don’t like it, we don’t care.

So it should come as no surprise that the reconstruction and grand opening of a collapsed portion of I-95 that collapsed just 12 days ago, and was completed in record time just north of downtown was celebrated the way only Philadelphians know how.

From left to right, that’s:
Franklin (Sixers)
Phang (Philadelphia Union, but they play in Chester)
Phillie Phanatic (our beloved OG, Go Phightins may replace Go Birds in certain Octobers)
Gritty (Flyers)
Swoop (Eagles)

I’m never moving back to Philly. The Florida winters have spoiled me forever, and Phillies Spring Training being down the street is close enough for me. But never forget that there is very little you can celebrate in Philadelphia that doesn’t involve sports. Even massive public works projects.

Go Birds, indeed.